"The Father Gene"

I had to comment on this. I came across this post on facebook a while back, and it reappeared on my wall time and time again by several friends on facbeook that decided to share it. I grew up watching a "A little Princess". With all those hopes and wishes that my father would some day come back and look for me.

I was raised by a fabulous single mother. We had our ups and downs and, yes she struggled A LOT. The back story isn't as important as to what i'm about to say, he did not fight for me.

     In 24 years of life he did not make ONE attempt to look for me. I tracked him down couple of years back. I honestly would look for him online at least couple of times a month once I got "the hang" of how to use some search websites more in depth.

When I first contacted him, I had high hopes and dreams, and stupidly assumed that the second we connected we would have the FATHER-DAUGHTER relationship we had always dreamed of. Well those dreams were shattered, he didn't have it in him. He didn't have that "father" gene. You don't gain that gene by being part of conception, you get that gene by being a part of a childs life. He didn't understand and would be utterly offended by my "potty mouth". At how "materialistic" he found me.

Then I realized that he too had his idea of his "dream child". I wasn't that dream child. If he wanted me to turn out so badly the way his high unrealistic standards expected me to, he should have been a part of it.

I'm thankful for what I have. Who I have, and above all I feel blessed to have a husband who LOVES our daughter 1000x times more than I could EVER imagine a father could love a daughter. Here is a picture of these two love birds being silly on Razzy's 2nd birthday. Razzy has her daddy wrapped around her little tiny finger and adores him to pieces, not a day goes by that she doesn't welcome him home with open arms and says "I love you, Dada". They are silly together, they play together, and she completes our family and has brought out an even more beautiful side of my husband that I had no idea that existed. 

I was in the hospital DYING, about to go into a surgery that they quite frankly they didn't know I was going to make it out of when my mom gave him a call for the first time and said "She's in a very serious condition, if you want to meet your daughter, right now is the time, you may not have time later". He hung up on her , immediately called me and sends me a series of LONG, and I do mean LONG text messages ranting and also SCREAMED and cursed at me for getting my mother involved. (Mind you, I was being wheeled by my surgeon who was running behind my bed to get me into the OR because my organ was starting to get necrotic (rot) and could ultimately cause necrosis in all of my organs, and dare I say it.. DIE. That's when I realized he had NO father gene, he had instead a BIG ego, and demanded time and time again I apologized for putting him in that position. 

This parents MAY have a reasonable excuse, but the only advice I have is, BE THANKFUL for who you have in your life, and be prepared to be THANKFUL for the ones you do not have.

-xoxo-

Lizbeth Muriel

Lizbeth@ilovemcallen.com

twitter.com/LizbethM

Facebook.com/Lizbeth.Muriel